Mumma guilt: is it really worth the trip?

At 24 weeks pregnant I’m finding myself quite sensitive and easily pissed off, most likely attributed to those prominent pesky pregnancy hormones. I seem to be really over thinking things lately (probably a trait I suffered from before pregnancy, but more so now). I’ve mostly been mulling over my past parenting mistakes and things I could have done differently. Like when my son had just turned two and I closed the car door on his poor little fingers. Or the time I put him in a bath filled with super hot water, because I didn’t check the water temperature first. I felt terrible about it! At the time I imagined other mothers looking down at me thinking “Quick, someone call child services!”. Yeah I made a few boo boos, probably more than I care to mention, but show me a mother who doesn’t.

shutterstock_guilt-ball-and-chain-jpgAt the end of the day The Little Guy came out completely unscathed. However, for some reason, I decided to beat myself up for it. Like somehow was a bad mum for not making more of an effort to prevent those things. At the end of the day I need to put things into perspective and understand that they were mistakes. Mistakes, which in the grand scheme of things, were small. I’ve learnt from them and hopefully won’t be making them again with baby number two. It’s funny though as parents how we can sometimes struggle to let things like that go. *Frozen’s “Let it go” blasts through my head*. 

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Daddy gets an A for effort.

While I’m only 11 weeks pregnant my poor Hubby has already had to put up with my snapping, constant complaining, non-stop napping, relentless crying, my annoying need to argue against any valid point he makes, pulling my nose up at the offensively suspect smells he seems to be omitting (now that’s probably not a recent thing, but my sense of smell has currently gone off the charts) and then there’s my general inability to do anywhere near as much as I usually do around the house. Even though I’ve been a complete lump and total pain in the arse, he seems to be taking it all in his stride. Let’s also not forget the fact that I have deprived him of sex for almost 3 months! Which I wrote about a few weeks ago; “The Fear: Why I’ve chosen to give up sex and exercise in the first trimester“. I’m pretty sure he’s thinking he deserves a bloody great big medal by now, and to be honest he probably does. 

Sure, due to all my hormonal changes he’s had to take on a little more responsibility around the house and with our son, on top of slogging his guts out at work. However, as he’s not always used to tending to parental and household duties on a large-scale, he can sometimes manage to miss a thing or two. Here’s a great example:

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First trimester pregnancy symptoms. The fun continues!

Okay, so far I’ve been experiencing all day sickness, sore breasts, extreme tiredness, bloating of the third degree, not to mention I’m starting to feel as though I need to see an endocrinologist – the hormones causing me to cry all the time are obviously out of control and need reining in – STAT! Oh, did I mention the angry killer facial pimples that have raised their ugly pustule filled heads in the last month? 

Now that I’m at week 10, let’s add a couple more to the mix shall we? woman-with-headacheTension
headaches – front and centre, enter nose bleed – stage left. At the beginning of the week there were a few days in a row where I felt as though my head were in a vice. I was feeling quite the pressure across the front sides of my forehead and found myself constantly rubbing my temples, in the hope the pain would miraculously disappear. 

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My first trimester hacks

Week 9 and I’ve managed to work my way through a few prominent pregnancy pests, by discovering a preggy hack or two. The first is a personalised technique I’ve developed that I like to call “controlled crying”. I use this technique to tackle my constant crying outbursts head on, and it’s great for when you’re at work or in public. It’s when something or someone triggers an immediate surge of particularly sad emotions (which has been constantly lately) and before I know it my eyeballs start to well up. What I do is I catch myself before the first tear drops and yell to myself (in my head, as I want to avoid coming off super mental to any onlookers) “Get a grip you soft idiot, they’re just hormones!”. Then I quickly blink the excess moisture away, take a deep breath and get on with my day. 

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Stick pregnancy test with question mark in indicator window

After many long months suffering from The Negative Pregnancy Test Blues. Will this test be any different?

Here we are, an anxious 2 days later. Now they do say the best results from an at home pregnancy test are given when you take one at the time of your missed period. But that could be almost a week away and there is no way I can wait that long! Even though taking pregnancy tests have become somewhat of a sport that has each time left me defeated these last 9 months. And with the possibility of yet another crushing disappointment, curiosity and hope have got the better of me. 

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